Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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