I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize
