i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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