I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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