I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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