I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
