brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
