i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
