well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize