You made me cry and you don't even care
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
