Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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