It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
