Do you still have your period?
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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