I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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