I'll buy you a vibrator, we can get married for tax benefits, and live happily ever after with lots of doggggs.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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