I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
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