My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
someone get that fucking seahorse.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
