Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Randomize
