just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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