Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
