How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
