What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
