She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize