let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
