I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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