as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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