nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i would one night stand the shit outta him
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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