sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
You're like the curious george of whores
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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