NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
