Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
