So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
