that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize
