roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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