dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
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