Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
I'm outside your house...sorry I feel like I don't need formal invites anymore.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
