My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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