I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
Randomize
