okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
If I give you a key to my place you have to promise to one day wake me up with a blowjob.
And by one day I mean once every two weeks.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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