I can tuck mytits in my pants
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
