You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
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