I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
He felt like a one man threesome
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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