The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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