Betty ford says i'm here all night
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
