I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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