Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
