So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
Farmville is her only friend.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
That was an excessively violent trivia night
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
