Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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