dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
