Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of j�ger and an empty bed here Friday.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
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