I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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